So often, it turns out so badly for these guys:
You see them running on the field, and you know they’re about to be swarmed by several oversized security guys, slammed to the ground, and paraded off the field for the entertainment of the jeering crowd.
This guy, though, had some different ideas. Like … planning.
And maybe even … sobriety.
He apparently knew, before his feet hit the Astroturf, what he wanted to do and how he wanted to get out of there. And he finally put to good use all of those weird architectural features of Minute Maid Park. Yes, we finally know why that hill is out there in center field. And that stupid elevated-greenery area: it’s all there so one lucky and very athletic fan can make his escape from what must be the hell of watching the Astros play.